Male Reverse Periods (MRP)

Why is it that single guys will go for weeks without meeting a new girl and get constantly rejected my girls they know, then one weekend get 10 girls phone numbers?

There is a point in the month where a man will look better than he did at any other part of the month. It's like we give off some sort of hormone. Men have a reverse period… that's right a reverse period. It's a reverse period, because unlike a woman's period, we feel and look our best.

It is important to know when your male reverse period will strike. Next time you feel better about yourself and you notice more women talking to you, mark that down on the calendar. Exactly one month later it will be back, but use it wisely.

Q: Does that "Scientific Chart" have anything to do with male reverse periods at all? A: No

Q: Girls never talk to me no matter what time of month it is. Is there something wrong with my Male Reverse Period or MRP? A: No, you're just ugly… sorry.

Q: How do I figure out when my MRP is? A: If you have a significant other than your MRP is at the same time your girlfriend's period is. This is why she always wants to have sex like bunnies when she has her period. But if you are single your MRP will come once a month, so just document the time of month you have it.

Q: I used to have a MRP once a month, but now it's gone. A: You got a chick pregnant. Avoid DNA tests at all costs; wait 9 months, and your MRP will be back in full force.

Q: If girls always want me do I have a constant MRP? A: Yes, but having a constant MRP is also known as being gay.

Q: Girls bleed during their periods. So does this mean that I will gain blood during my reverse period? A: Yes, in your penis.

Q: My MRP is getting me in trouble with my girlfriend. Is there any way I can stop it? A: Yes, it's called male birth control (MBC). There are many choices of MBC. One is pizza, eat a ton of pizza and get fat. Being fat lowers intensity of your reverse period. The cheapest and easiest form of MBC is not showering during your reverse period. The smell will cover up any extra attractiveness that you have.

-Robert Bacon / uwcollegelife.com